crying wolf

I have been fortunate that a second grade boy named D'Quan recently moved to the school where I am interning. From the beginning, we were told to watch for him, as he'd had a series of tough breaks and a long list of behavioral issues in previous schools. The other intern I work with connected with him immediately, spending lots and lots of time with him. It's true that he does struggle to contain his energy, enthusiasm, and (sometimes) frustrations, but for the most part he is all smiles and liberal hugs. I love to see him in the morning, running up to give me a huge embrace with a smile stretching from ear to ear. It's knowing that D'Quan has experienced pain that makes that abundant joy so beautiful to behold.

Something struck me in an exchange we had recently. The other intern was having lunch with him in our "office" (a noisy stage area separated by the cafeteria by a mere curtain), and she needed to run up to the main office. She asked me to hang out with D'Quan for a few minutes. Soon after she left, he asked me if I'd ever heard about a story with a boy who said wolf all the time. Puzzled, I asked if he meant the story of the boy who cried wolf. He said he thought it was a cool story, and went on a good ten minute storytelling spree about vampires, werewolves, and scared boys who cried a lot. I fought to suppress a smile, delighted to hear the inner workings of a child's mind so openly expressed.

I asked him if he wanted to hear the story I had heard. He agreed, so I quickly summarized the story which is fairly prevalent in Western folklore (see http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pDyuyu9dDdY). He asked me what happened to the boy and the sheep when no one would come to the rescue. I wasn't sure how to answer this... wasn't the whole point about the boy realizing he shouldn't make up lies so people will believe him when danger did come? Yet here sat D'Quan, seriously concerned about the boy and his sheep, questioning why the adults in the boy's life would not come to help when he was in distress! Did it really matter that the boy had messed up before? Shouldn't the adults still help him? And why should the sheep suffer?

We talked a little more about this but D'Quan's focus quickly moved to another topic. He was no longer concerned about the story at all. But he made me think about how our society's fairy tales and folklore may be teaching values that we may not intend. Do we mean to put the weight on a child's shoulders as they learn right from wrong? Perhaps the boy who cried wolf would learn better through the modeling of an adult who did what was right and saved him from harm, rather than by ignoring a clear and present danger? Do we want to frighten our children into doing right, or rather ask them to follow our example? It set me to thinking quite a bit about how we teach children about character.

Thank you, D'Quan, for the insight you provided me through your simple curiosity and sweet spirit. I think we adults have a lot to learn from children like you.